When a construction worker discovers a secret passageway under your hundred-year-old mansion, it can either be a really great thing or a terrible disaster.
On Ghosts Season 1 Episode 13, Sam and Jay cracked open the door to secret bank vault — using the birthday of Hetty’s husband maid, no less — only to find that they weren’t going to inherit a bunch of riches.
Instead, another ghost emerged: Hetty’s husband and first cousin (I said what I said), Elias (played by Matt Walsh), a real-life robber baron.
And he was much worse in person then Hetty ever let on. Somehow, he was worse in death than he was in life.
Immediately after emerging from the dark depths of the vault where his only companion was his own very decayed corpse, he attempted to hit on Alberta.
Hetty’s reaction — “really?” — said everything you needed to know.
From there, things only got worse.
When he realized that his obedient wife had changed and become someone who has her own voice and opinions, he was adamant to permanently get rid of the “livings” for corrupting her.
Upon hearing that they needed to host Liz and Kenny’s wedding to put the mansion on the map or they’d bankrupt and be forced to sell, he made it his mission to sabotage them using his newly discovered power.
While walking through people and making them horny isn’t an ideal situation when you have a mansion full of people, it did make for some hilarious television.
First, the social-media maven bride hit on Jay and told him she wanted nothing more than to grab his butt.
Alberta’s “that little thing” comment didn’t go unnoticed, but it was definitely under appreciated with so much going on.
Jay and Samantha contemplated telling Kenny about the incident until the latter realized that this was Elias’s ghost power.
Unfortunately, before she was able to convey the message to Kenny, Elias walked right through her, which made her extra bothered.
He then walked through Jay, who joined his wife in attempting to convince Kenny to have a threesome.
Honestly, I have no idea how Rose McIver or Utkarsh Ambudkar kept a straight face through this scene, but I’d really love to see the bloopers to see how many times they had to film it.
Naturally, the bizarre situation freaked Kenny and Liz out. Samantha tried her best to explain it, you know, without divulging that there was an evil, mustache-twirling ghost running around, but the couple decided not to host their wedding at the mansion.
The realization that they were going to have to sell hit Sam and the ghosts hard. They’ve bonded and become quite a family. Plus, since Sam can see them, this is the most alive they’ve felt in years.
But Elias? He rejoiced in his victory.
Hetty tried to have a come to Jesus moment with her womanizing husband, but he showed no remorse for anything he did prior to death — not the cheating, not the manipulating, not the stealing from other people.
He was genuinely a terrible man who was proud of using other people for his own gain.
The difference here is that he was stuck in a black room for decades, while she was out here watching life play out over generations. She was learning from people, and though some of her ideals were still a little outdated, she changed for the better.
She became a better human.
When Elias made it clear that he wouldn’t change, Hetty told him to go to hell, and to hell he went.
Quite literally. Everyone stood around shocked as the ground opened up and swallowed him into a bright red pit of fire.
Or, as Alberta put it, “he went down on us.”
I’m with Trevor — if that’s how she wants to say it, why not have a little fun?
Elias got what he deserved, but so did Hetty: closure. She finally got to stand up to the disgusting man she married!
I honestly believed that after she made her grand speech about evolving into the kind of woman she could be proud of, she would get sucked off (you know, the term for crossing over into the other world), but losing Hetty wouldn’t benefit the series in the slightest, so for selfish reasons, I’m glad that wasn’t the case.
And now everyone in the house believes that she might have the power to banish people to an eternity of suffering. I could think of a few ways that she can use that to her advantage.
Meanwhile, the ghosts noticed that since Elias had an expensive timepiece on his ghost, it meant that he must have it on his corpse.
Jay took one for the team and dug through the dead guy in the bank vault to fetch the watch. Why didn’t he use gardening gloves?
With such a pricey possession in their hands, the livings bought themselves some extra time to get the BnB ready for customers.
Ghosts has delivered one exceptional episode after the other, but this one was a real treat.
It’s always fun to reconnect with the ghost’s past and explore who they used to be.
But the best part of the episode was that it featured every single ghost. Not every character is featured in every episode, so it’s nice when we get a moment that they are all together.
What did you think of the episode?