On this morning’s The View broadcast, the hosts tackled an unusual advice segment: a woman asked for counseling on feeling guilty for turning down her brother’s invitation to his nude wedding.
The hosts Whoopi Goldberg, Sara Haines, Joy Behar, Sunny Hostin, and Alyssa Farah Griffin – unsurprisingly – had a field day.
Goldberg quickly looked to Behar and said: “Now, Joy is the only person who can really speak to something like this.”
(For those who don’t know, Behar met her husband at a semi-nude colony.) Despite her experiences with nudity, Behar said she would also turn down the invitation. She cited that even her dermatologist doesn’t see her naked.
“No one sees me naked,” she explained. “I met my husband at a semi-nudist colony and he hasn’t seen me naked since! I’m not going to go to a wedding naked. Nobody sees me naked.”
Griffin posed her own question, attempting to get a grasp of the logistics of a nude wedding. She wondered if there would be a wedding photographer. “Nobody wants photos circulating of them naked,” she said. She even speculated if people would eat and dance as wedding guests normally do.
“Are we sitting?” she asked. “You don’t want to be sitting naked.”
Behar quickly jumped in with an apt question on cutting cake.
“How about cutting the cake? That could be a disaster,” she said. “Talk about a circumcision!”
Hostin aimed to find a solution for guests of all comfortability levels. She proposed a “nudist-optional” affair, where guests could attend dressed in clothing.
The more experienced Behar retorted that the naked attendees would “feel uncomfortable.”
As the panel continued to speculate, post hypotheticals, and make more naked jokes, the conversation spiraled into NSFW territory, much to the amusement of the live audience. Behar began to wonder about the ceremony itself.
“Where do they keep the ring, for example?” she asked. She answered her own question: “In the rolls of fat on me.” Goldberg suggested that the ring could be stored “on the nipple.” Behar had the idea of putting it “underneath your boob.”
Sounds like the hosts may know how to host a nude wedding after all.
The View, weekdays, ABC